Haldi invitation and ceremony messages

At the haldi, a paste of turmeric, usually mixed with things like gram flour, sandalwood or rose water depending on the family, is smoothed onto the bride’s and groom’s face, arms and feet by the people closest to them. It is usually held in the morning, on the wedding day itself or a day or two before.

It is often a home function. The bride and groom each have their own haldi at their own family’s house, so each side invites its own relatives, neighbours and close friends. That makes the guest list smaller than the wedding’s, and it is one reason couples ask how to invite some people to the haldi without inviting everyone.

The name changes with the family. Marwari and Gujarati families often call it pithi, many Punjabi families hold the maiyan with vatna, and some South Asian Muslim families call their similar ubtan ritual manjha. In Bengali weddings the gaye holud often begins at the groom’s home, and turmeric that has touched him is then carried to the bride’s home with gifts. In Tamil weddings the mangala snanam, a ritual bath on the wedding morning, plays a similar part.

• The name your family uses, written as you say it: Haldi, Pithi Dastoor, Gaye Holud, Mangala Snanam or anything else.
• The date and a start time. Mornings run by the clock of the house, so add a rough end time if the bride has a mehndi to get to later.
• The full address and a map link. A family home or a relative’s terrace is harder to find than a hotel, and guests may be arriving from out of town.
• Which part of the house, such as the courtyard or the terrace, if the building is large.
• A dress code, and a one-line description of what happens, for guests who have never been to one.

Yellow is the usual request, and many families ask for shades of yellow, orange or marigold so the photos glow. The more useful note is practical: turmeric stains clothes and skin, and cousins rarely limit it to the bride and groom.

Say plainly if guests should avoid silk and white, and bring a change of clothes if lunch or another function follows. If water or flower petals will be thrown, or the courtyard floor will be wet, a word about footwear saves a few slips.

Most couples add the haldi as one function on the wedding invitation, with its own date, time, venue, map link, description and dress code. Guests reply for each function separately, so you see each family’s reply and headcount for the haldi apart from the wedding.

You can also publish an invitation with only the haldi on it, for example for neighbours who will come to the house but not travel to the wedding. Both partners’ names are needed to publish, and the preview in WhatsApp shows the couple’s names. Starting from a template does not copy its sample functions: you pick the haldi during setup or add it in the editor.